I awoke on Monday morning with an obvious cold. Sore throat, head stuffy and not feeling 100%. Immediately began my vitamin C routine, but also checked what had happened 10 days back. I have this theory that if you get a cold, go back 10 days and you will find some unresolved issue. Head colds are usually mental confusion, so I checked back and sure enough 10 days earlier I had one of those days when my mouth seemed to have a mind of its own and I said a few things which I was not happy with. In fact I had felt quite guilty over and had spent one night 'worrying' about it. The main situation I was worried about I apologized to the woman the next day, who was not a bit concerned about it at all. Shows that often what we concern ourselves with, others do not.
Upon checking back, and ensuring I had forgiven myself, I thought the cold would disappear. This has happened in the past. But no, Tuesday came with my throat not being so sore, but it was definitely beginning to move into my chest. My Tuesday comprised of going to Kelowna for a Live Blood Analysis, (It came out really well) and my Massage, which by the way I look forward to, especially as we are now working on my body back in birth and embryo status. Wow, it is interesting what comes up. Mind you it has taken us a year to get there. Things which I thought I had dealt with still coming up as it is being held in the body. But I digress. Tuesday night I took some Buckley's "taste awful, but it works" and again it usually takes care of it. But no, Wednesday came, sore throat totally gone, but my cough was more pronounced. I took it easy most of the day, went for my walk with Jeanne and got ready for the meditation class.
My weekly drop in meditation group is always a great part of my week. I had three new people, and we fit into my living room just fine. I apologized for my cough, and we began. We were using Gentle Wisdom by the Faerie Realm cards for our main meditation concentration. I had some water so every time I felt like I wanted to cough, I had a sip of water and managed to keep myself from coughing during the 20 minutes. Even though every now and again I wanted to cough, I still managed to get the 'gentle' message for myself.
Earlier in the day I had come to realize that I had been around a person (on that Friday 10 days ago) who had a cough and was not well. That I somehow had caught the same thing. Darn! Anyway during the meditation I was shown that I had been judgmental of this person for several reasons, and the judgment had also been on myself (my worrying). I had a HUGE lesson about Judgment, and the letting go of all judgment.
Years ago my guide RaMa had taught me that one of the main things to do to get off the wheel of life, was to let go of judgment and I thought I was doing quite well. But, obviously not good enough. How often we call our judgement of ourselves as being self critical - its judgment. When we see a behaviour of someone we look at it and criticize inside, its judgment.
Now, I sit here, with my cough deepening and I will keep on working to alleviate this, but I truly thought now that I understand it will leave, but looks like I have to go the course. I do believe its not as bad as it could be though.
I'm on alert now for all my little 'judgments' of others and myself. Another step to self awareness and connection to the source.
Remember look at where you are critical, self or otherwise and no you are really judging.
Norma Cowie 250 490 0654 Email: firstname.lastname@example.org